Hello Blogger worlds, it's been a while.. since I've posted it's not that I don't love you all I've just been busy preparing for my recital . My 6 week classes are almost up and a lot of work for the end of the semester for me ... IT's so crazy Bare with me I will be fully back to blogging soon.
Also Anyone want to give me some ideas to help me get my blog a new style comment here please !!!!!
I want to make it look AWESOME . Thanks
Wednesday, January 30, 2013
Monday, January 21, 2013
week 3
So I had a car accident about a week ago and we are finally getting the car fix which means I am in a rental car. YAYAYAY no not really. I have a 2013 Chevy Cruz.. I am really enjoying the ride of it the gas mileage is a lot better then the caliber and the ride is a lot smoother. I really enjoy this kind of car. I am really thinking of getting that kind of car when I finally graduate from college and get a better job.. that way I can have a car if I decide to move.
I have a good way of thinking i believe It's just going to take a while.
Friday, January 18, 2013
Fearless
Normally I am not fearless because I just back down from anything that someone gives me to do. I need to be more fearless in what I do.
Fearless, what does that mean to most people is that your fearless and nothing scares you or it does, but you don't show it.
Lets just say that for me fearless wasn't in my vocabulary until recently.
I've dealt with a lot in my life from losing my dad at a young age and being the butt of jokes within the family just from being a little different then most. I have a learning disability since I was a kid and also had a speech problem as well. I am not saying that it defines who I am because I learn differently, and that it takes me a while to comprehend something to make it easier to say, but it comes out harder to understand. Fearless to be who I am . I've had a lot of set backs in my life where I was close to death as a baby because I was born 3 months to early. I was born on January 4th 1988 when I was originally supposed to be born on March 24th 1988. HUGE difference. I was one pound yes you read that correctly one pound. While my twin sister was 2 pounds and didn't make it through the night. I've always wondered if my twin sister was alive today what it would truly be like. Would there still be so much negativity towards me and my twin or would it just be everyone against me?
Lately I've been noticing a lot of negativity towards me and I can't quite put my finger or thought on it. It's like I feel as though I'm never going to be good enough. I've heard from my sister and my mom that use that common sense that we know that you don't have. Why can't you do something this simple. You are a stupid cunt.. You will never find someone to love your bitchiness no one will ever want to marry you. The list can go on. You might think that I am over reacting but, in all sense it's real as it will ever be. There are days that I will be in my room for hours just blasting music through my speakers because It's the only place that I will not disappoint my mom. I feel just because I haven't graduated yet I will on May 10th of this year. But I want to tell my family not to come because I know some of the comments will be coming back.
I've been in a really great relationship it was three months on Wednesday. He sees the real me the one that is so outgoing and always has a smile, but can still see the pain in the eyes from what goes on. He is always there when she needs him and even spending the night at least one day a week is a good way to get her out of the negativity in the house. She finally feels accepted and feels that she can finally be happy.
I feel as though I've been stuck in this darkness or negativity for so long that I wish I wasn't starting to become so negative, but being out of that negativity is what will make it a ton better.
I hope you enjoyed reading.
Love Mary Kay
Fearless, what does that mean to most people is that your fearless and nothing scares you or it does, but you don't show it.
Lets just say that for me fearless wasn't in my vocabulary until recently.
I've dealt with a lot in my life from losing my dad at a young age and being the butt of jokes within the family just from being a little different then most. I have a learning disability since I was a kid and also had a speech problem as well. I am not saying that it defines who I am because I learn differently, and that it takes me a while to comprehend something to make it easier to say, but it comes out harder to understand. Fearless to be who I am . I've had a lot of set backs in my life where I was close to death as a baby because I was born 3 months to early. I was born on January 4th 1988 when I was originally supposed to be born on March 24th 1988. HUGE difference. I was one pound yes you read that correctly one pound. While my twin sister was 2 pounds and didn't make it through the night. I've always wondered if my twin sister was alive today what it would truly be like. Would there still be so much negativity towards me and my twin or would it just be everyone against me?
Lately I've been noticing a lot of negativity towards me and I can't quite put my finger or thought on it. It's like I feel as though I'm never going to be good enough. I've heard from my sister and my mom that use that common sense that we know that you don't have. Why can't you do something this simple. You are a stupid cunt.. You will never find someone to love your bitchiness no one will ever want to marry you. The list can go on. You might think that I am over reacting but, in all sense it's real as it will ever be. There are days that I will be in my room for hours just blasting music through my speakers because It's the only place that I will not disappoint my mom. I feel just because I haven't graduated yet I will on May 10th of this year. But I want to tell my family not to come because I know some of the comments will be coming back.
I've been in a really great relationship it was three months on Wednesday. He sees the real me the one that is so outgoing and always has a smile, but can still see the pain in the eyes from what goes on. He is always there when she needs him and even spending the night at least one day a week is a good way to get her out of the negativity in the house. She finally feels accepted and feels that she can finally be happy.
I feel as though I've been stuck in this darkness or negativity for so long that I wish I wasn't starting to become so negative, but being out of that negativity is what will make it a ton better.
I hope you enjoyed reading.
Love Mary Kay
Thursday, January 10, 2013
Epic Fail
I hope to be better for next week.
Friday, January 4, 2013
Happy Birthday !! and New Beginnings
So Today is a huge milestone in my life. Today along with my twin sister who is in heaven are celebrating turning 25 years old. I've been on this earth to do something special. Whether it be somebodies shoulder to cry on or too just be a good friend or even a best friend. I am that nice girl who will almost always never saying no to something. God has put us on this earth for something and we all have a special thing about us. Mine might not be music but you never know.
I am doing this blogger biggest loser challenge starting next week. if you want the details vist this blog Becky at Java Mama she has all the rules and details..
I'm truly excited to be doing this not just for the competing I really don't care about it that much, but I just want to be inspired from all the motivations from everyone in blogger land. Because sometimes a stranger can give you the best motivation. This Starts January 7th til March 25th .. Every Monday I will blog my progress I might give you a lot of detail or minium detail. Wish me luck on this new adventure. I also bought myself a ipod shuffle because even though i have the iphone and i mostly use that for music. I thought that the shuffle would be better because it's smaller and I can clip it to my shirt and then i won't have it lying on the floor if I want to do sit ups or crunches. I am content with it.
So I know I told you in my last blog that randomly got deleted on me , that I got a new guitar. Well that guitar only lasted me about a week in a day ..Yikes apparently mom didn't look at the quality of the guitar and it had far more damage that I didn't notice anyways as a part of my christmas and birthday since they are so close together anyways. Ever have that problem of what to get someone when Christmas and their birthday are so close together?
My best friend / sister is coming into town this week for a couple days I am hoping that she can stop by for a little bit so I can say hi to her. She just recently got a new job and has been married for over a month already it's exciting and I am completely happy for her. I just wish I could live at least a little bit closer to make the distance less stressful and strainful on money. She has been my best friend and sister forever. Her and I can pick up any conversation where ever we left off even if it was weeks ago. She even told me on New Years when I was going to get married because she wants to be in a wedding lol.... I love her but, I am not quite there yet with a relationship. I mostly have to love myself first before I can truly love someone else. Because most of the time I don't see what others see in me I just see the negativity.
Anyways It's time for me to get ready for a party that my mom has graciously put together with my neighbors it's a pasta and cake night with possibly some wine to be opened and good company. I hope everyone will enjoy their night and that you have a great New Year !
Love Mary Kay
Cheers!!!
I'm truly excited to be doing this not just for the competing I really don't care about it that much, but I just want to be inspired from all the motivations from everyone in blogger land. Because sometimes a stranger can give you the best motivation. This Starts January 7th til March 25th .. Every Monday I will blog my progress I might give you a lot of detail or minium detail. Wish me luck on this new adventure. I also bought myself a ipod shuffle because even though i have the iphone and i mostly use that for music. I thought that the shuffle would be better because it's smaller and I can clip it to my shirt and then i won't have it lying on the floor if I want to do sit ups or crunches. I am content with it.
So I know I told you in my last blog that randomly got deleted on me , that I got a new guitar. Well that guitar only lasted me about a week in a day ..Yikes apparently mom didn't look at the quality of the guitar and it had far more damage that I didn't notice anyways as a part of my christmas and birthday since they are so close together anyways. Ever have that problem of what to get someone when Christmas and their birthday are so close together?
My best friend / sister is coming into town this week for a couple days I am hoping that she can stop by for a little bit so I can say hi to her. She just recently got a new job and has been married for over a month already it's exciting and I am completely happy for her. I just wish I could live at least a little bit closer to make the distance less stressful and strainful on money. She has been my best friend and sister forever. Her and I can pick up any conversation where ever we left off even if it was weeks ago. She even told me on New Years when I was going to get married because she wants to be in a wedding lol.... I love her but, I am not quite there yet with a relationship. I mostly have to love myself first before I can truly love someone else. Because most of the time I don't see what others see in me I just see the negativity.
Anyways It's time for me to get ready for a party that my mom has graciously put together with my neighbors it's a pasta and cake night with possibly some wine to be opened and good company. I hope everyone will enjoy their night and that you have a great New Year !
Love Mary Kay
Cheers!!!
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